An Open Letter to No One

I’m gonna love you with all of me, with all the love I’m giving myself and my life. I’m gonna learn more about love by loving you. I’m gonna love you better as I grow through life.

I’m not gonna be easy because I’m gonna be whole. I’m gonna be true to you.

I cannot offer you a love full of answers, only a love filled with the unknown – we can brave our way through it together, claiming the answers we seek as we live the questions.

I will take care of your heart when the going gets tough.

I can only love you as much as I love myself, as much as I love life. As long as choosing you feels like choosing me and choosing life, I’ll be with you.

Our love will have an open door. I won’t chain you with me. Each of us is welcome to stay as long as it feels right. I can join you in creating a life striving for autonomy. I will protect your light.

Love, for me, is about honoring each other’s freedom – freedom to be who they are, freedom to live on their own terms, fully, with neither apologies nor regrets.

If you’re longing for a life of growth, working on becoming who you can be and wanting some company, someone who will be a witness to your becoming, someone who will support you, I can be that someone for you. I can provide you with a love made for trees. We can grow alongside each other, roots getting stronger, branches reaching for the sun, breathing the clarity of the vast, blue sky.

It doesn’t matter how much time we spend together. I’ll treasure every moment of it. Through our journey, we’ll make the world a little bit brighter, more vivid, richer in textures – with more depth. I’ll leave a mark in your heart, you can take comfort in it when you’re lonely or scared, when you’re doubting yourself. I’ll take your warmth with me wherever I go. You’ll add more to my strength, something I will need as I brave my way through life.

I’m gonna love with you every here and now, with all that I know about love.  I’m gonna love you until I can be fully with you.

I will love you until I’m no longer scared to lose you – only then will I know I have fully loved.

snowylights

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