I woke up the other day and realized that Shame can be an all-pervasive thing hanging down at the center of our life.
It affects how we see our potential, how we behave in relationships, the decisions we make – even the seemingly little ones.
It’s not, but it can start of, as a temporary state – shame for making a mistake, for embarrassing ourselves in front of our peers.
But then what I’m mostly referring to is this shame about more permanent matters or things we cannot change. It’s shame for being who we are, shame for what we can and cannot do, shame for things we knew or didn’t, shame for where we have been, what we have done, who we were with.
A voice spoke to me and said, “Don’t be ashamed of your story.” I didn’t know I was. But I was and I still am – I am going through it.
I am ashamed that majority of the time I am uncertain – about my path, about my goals, about what matters to me. I feel wrong for wanting to just simply “be” – to create, have fun, reflect and start all over again.
Not being ambitious and successful in the eyes of modern society make me feel inadequate. It’s like no matter what I do, how much I’ve loved, no matter how much I’ve grown as a soul and a human I am still not good enough. I still don’t deserve the space I occupy.
I think Shame is one of those things at the center of our story. It’s what makes us “Us”. It resides in our vulnerable core. It carries the lessons in life that only us can share with the rest of the world.
Because Shame paves the path for our own Clarity, Authenticity – Wholeness. It can lead us back to where we come from/who we are – Unconditional Love.
I think we should speak more about what we are ashamed of – this could free us and others, too, who can relate to what we are going through. I think we are more alike than we think we are.